Post Surgery

I am sitting on the couch, writing and watching TV. In case you are wondering the show is one of those entertainment shows and they are talking about "Dancing with the Stars". Wow, do we not have anything better to do now days than watch people, called stars, dance? And how is Bristol Palin a star? That is thirty seconds of my life I will never get back!

Well, as I stated, we are home. The surgery went okay. Once I was under, the doctor began and removed the first lymph node. It was then immediately sent to the lab where it was tested and confirmed that it was cancer. He then removed all lymph nodes that he could find. He also told us that there was an area of tissue that didn't look good to him so he removed it as well. After that he began working on other areas of tissue, as we understand it, as a precautionary measure. During that time I stopped breathing, and did so a few times. The decision was then made between he and the Anesthesiologist to stop the surgery. He did tell us that he accomplished what he hoped to but was unable to continue to do more because of the breathing issues. We hope that all was removed and won't have to do another surgery in the same area, but that will remain to be seen. We will now have to watch the issues that come with having the nodes removed. The next step, at this point, will be to make an appointment with MD Anderson in Houston. We are going to try to get it done next week. The Oncologist here will wait on the lab results to come back and we will then meet with her and begin to formulate a treatment plan. As I stated in my previous blog, much more will be known once the labs come back. I am feeling good for the most part. I am in a small amount of pain but it is much better than the last two surgeries. I do have another drain tube in the arm pit that we have to drain once an hour or so, but luckily this time the after care is minimal.

The last two times I have had surgery we made arrangements for the kids to be elsewhere. This time, after some discussion, we gave them the option to go to school or go to the hospital with us. Each of the last two times it was hard on them to not be there through the whole process, which left them with a lot of questions. The hope was if we took them they would feel more part of the process and help answer some of their questions. They each chose to go with us and I am glad they did. They got to be there with their mom and my parents which I think helped all of them. They did great too. They got to watch the IV nurse put my IV in, got to see the inside of the room, and got a great laugh when they saw me in the "gown". It was quiet funny to watch and listen to them try not to laugh out loud when they saw me.

Well, it wasn't the news we were hoping for. It was the worst case scenario at this point. We still have a lot of unanswered questions that will simply take time. We have always known in the back of our minds that this day and others like it could come. As I think I stated in the last blog September 24, 2010 would have been my one year mark. Almost made it. I cannot even begin to express the feelings and emotions we have all felt over the last few weeks and especially today. Scared, angry, numb, hopeful, overwhelmed, tired, we have covered them all. Funny how things change so quickly in life. We face a new challenge, one that brings more to the table than last time. Along with a greater sense of urgency, comes an even greater will to fight no matter what it takes. I have been reminded today as I spent time with family and friends, that nothing else matters but my life with my family and friends. Each of you brings strength and hope into our lives everyday. My outlook is simple, I will fight with everything I have and enjoy each day to it's fullest. And at least if I am going be sick in will be in the fall and not the horrible heat we have had this summer! We will do our best to keep everyone informed as we go.

Remember each day to put one foot in front of the other, drink a lot of water, and don't forget to breath.........